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I enjoy awards shows  (the Emmys and Oscars, but not so much the People’s Choice) and I have been thinking about the awards for acting that I would like to give some colleagues.  Authenticity is essential for church leaders.  And many of us seminary-trained pastors can tell you that the Greek word for “hypocrite” means “actor.”  And yet . . .

Sometimes church leaders are required to act professional and pastoral in the face of what is humorous, dramatic and real.  And so, with this in mind – as I was driving home last night from Charlottesville to Chicagoland as the Emmy’s were being broadcast, I decided that these friends should win trophies:

Best Actor in a Comedy – the organist who sat at his organ bench in front of a whole congregation of people during a funeral when the granddaughter of The Deceased sang – with a karaoke machine – that song from Titanic, really loudly and out of tune, without cracking a smile.  Amazing.

Best Actress in a Mini-Series – the pastor who facilitated the New Beginnings  process and endured a series of congregational meetings, cottage gatherings, and prayerful conversations in hopes of shifting a congregation from a (dying) 1950s model church to a (post-modern) 21st  onlyto witness her congregation voting down the shift officially.

Best Actress in a Drama – The Ruling Elder who sat on a Session (i.e. Board of Elders) while they orchestrated a plan to leave the denomination, serving as a voice for those who wanted to stay in the denomination.

Best Writing – The pastor/poet who writes liturgy regularly that stirs souls and inspires all who gather in spite of the fact that most of them watch that woman named Snooki and assorted survival shows.

Thanks to all of you who serve as professionals and spiritual creatives in world of Kardashians.  Bless you all.

Weeping Woman by Picasso

I was a good kick ball player years ago and subsequently was never “picked last.” But I remember feeling pain for those who were – the clumsy science kids or the heavyset kids with Blow Pops in their lunchboxes.

Not only is it painful not to get picked often and early, but watching our children not get picked is excruciating.  When TBC was not picked for the first round of Safety Patrols in Fourth Grade, it was as if her whole world had collapsed.  When she didn’t make a certain soccer team in high school, it felt like someone had died.

Of course allowing our kids to learn resilience and how to cope with loss is a big part of parenting.  They will make choices.  Their dream colleges will make choices.  Their potential employers will make choices.  Their prospective boyfriends and girlfriends will make choices.

Sometimes we are chosen.  And sometimes we aren’t.

As I pastor, I could neatly sum it all up to “It wasn’t meant to be.”  God’s plan and all that.  Something/someone better will come along.  This is preparing you for something in your future.  But these words do not seem helpful in the bitter depths of emptiness and agony.

Sometimes pastors imagine themselves in a certain pulpit, on a certain staff, serving a certain people but they are not chosen.  Is it because I am too young?  Too old?  Too white?  Too dark?  Too gay?  Too single?  Too conservative?  Too liberal?  Too much like the last pastor?  Too little like the last pastor?

Why didn’t he/she/they pick me?

Sometimes a job is picked over a relationship.  Sometimes a way of life is chosen over a person.  This also hurts.

How do we convey this in light of our most excruciating disappointments?

The past couple of days, I’ve been driving – slowly and alone – across the country to get to my TBC.  There was no time to check out books on CD.  There was no time to find good music.  I just tossed things in the car and left.

So I listened to the radio.  Between Illinois and Virginia, there are huge swaths of real estate with only Christian Talk Radio on the airwaves.

I like radio.  I like Christians.  But this is a sample of what I heard on a show called “Ask the Pastor”:

Guy Calling In:  So where in the Bible is Muhammad mentioned?  Because if he’s not in the Bible, why do we even allow Muslims to congregate in this country?

Radio Pastor:  You are absolutely right.  Muhummad is NOT mentioned in the Bible.  Good point sir.

God help us all.*

The problem with ignorance is not merely that we don’t have the facts; it’s that the absence of the facts impacts the way we relate to others.  If I know even a little something about the history of Islam, I will better understand Muslim neighbors.  But if I cling to false information or have no hunger for factual  – as well as spiritual – truth, thus choosing to be ignorant and being separated from The Other (other faiths, other political parties, other races, other sexual orientations, etc.) then Am I Committing a Sin?

Jesus connected with all kinds of people.  As far as I can tell, Jesus connected with every kind of person.  If we are to Be Like Jesus, aren’t we supposed to connect with The Other too?  And we have to know them and know about them to connect, right?

I asked a remarkable Roman Catholic-ish/Buddhist-ish friend the other day: Is it a sin to be ignorant?  And she said, “No.”  But I wonder.

*The More We Know Moment:  The books of the Greek (New) Testament were written between the 50s and the 90s AD.  Note that Jesus was ascended into heaven after the resurrection in the 30s.  Muhammad was not even born until ~570.

We had a long Presbytery Assembly meeting last night.

For you non-Presbyterians, our occasional Presbytery Assembly meeting is for business and announcements.  Ours meets five times a year, but other Presbyteries meet more or fewer times depending on their own desires and rules.

I staff our Presbytery but my responsibilities don’t involve planning these meetings, really.  But I have some ideas – especially after such a long meeting last night and many other long meetings I’ve attended in my 25+ years of attending these things.

If I could change just 3 things about Presbytery Assembly meetings, I would do this:

1. Have Pre-Presbytery events that looked more like TED Talks than church workshops.  10-20 Minute Talks About Ideas.  Just imagine: Sculpted Space, Within and Without;  The Global Food Waste Scandal; Photos That Bear Witness to Human Slavery – all real TED talks that members and friends of our Presbytery could also conceivably share from their own experience and expertise.
2. (From the exceptional Shawna Bowman) Experience the examination of candidates for professional ministry to be a teaching moment during which they teach us.
3. Show a stream of slides throughout the meeting showing images of what’s going on in our churches, photos of new pastors with their names and the names of their church/hospital/educational institution/etc., photos of pastors, educators, musicians, etc. with significant anniversaries which include their names and occasion (e.g. Susie Smith, Ordained 15 years on September 19. Joe Jones the organist of St. Nicholas became a dad on September 1 – with requisite image of cute baby)  This would help us with names and faces, and the recognition of what’s going on for us corporately and personally.  Also this would add interest for those of us who have attention deficit issues.

So, what would you change if you could change 3 things about your church, your presbytery, or (this could get interesting) your pastor?

Image is Water and Spirit by Shawna Bowman.  See more here.

The Daily Show is kind of brilliant, and last night’s Special Report by John Oliver  sparked some interesting ideas.  Phyllis Tickle and others talk of the Religious Rummage Sale that happens every 500 years – more or less:

~4 BCE – The Birth of Jesus the Messiah

and about 500 years later . . .   476 – The Fall of Rome

and about 500 years later . . .  1054 – The Great Schism

and about 500 years later . . . 1517 – The Great Reformation

and about 500 years later . . . The Great Emergence?

Last night John Oliver “reported” that Islam – at the age of  1400 or so years –  is “a teenager” in Religion Years, and he asked the audience to remember what Christians were doing in our “Teenage Years.”  Think of teenagers and some of the nutty things they do.  And then look at what the Christian Church did when they were “teenagers”:

In 1415, the church burned John Hus – the Czech priest accused of heresy – at the stake.

In 1536, William Tyndale, the Bible translator was burned at the stake for opposing King Henry’s divorce.

In 1572, Huguenot Christians were massacred on St. Bartholomew’s Day by Roman Catholics.

And then there were The Crusades.  Those out of control “teenagers” in the 13th Century.  No, it’s not exactly every 500 years or exactly the same time table as Islam, but you get my point.

Crazy things are happening in the world over misunderstandings, a ridiculous video in this age when anyone can film and post a crazy video, and an election in the United States.

What I’m saying is that history is really interesting.  And we need to mature.

Most of us don’t want to be teenagers any more.  But God guide those who are.

Image is from this.

Desperate people do desperate things.

• Parents illegally cross borders to find a better life for their children.
• Teachers strike to get better benefits for themselves, better facilities for their schools, better resources for their students.
• Oppressed people throw rocks and homemade bombs at their enemies across fences to protest for their cause.

Some of us find these practices understandable and some of us are outraged.  As people of faith, we are called to trust in God when we are oppressed or insecure or losing ourselves.  But then Jesus also calls us to be act boldly against what is unjust.

Martin Luther put it this way:  Pecca fortiter, sed fortius fide et gaude in Christo. “Sin boldly, but believe and rejoice in Christ more boldly still.”

It’s a lifelong journey trying to figure all this out.  What are we willing to do to live out our faith?  What is right and what is wrong?  I wish we could have civil conversations about these things.

Image is from an art gallery for the works of undocumented students.

For the sake of argument, I’m going to assume that

• Sam Bacile 
• The Muslim militants who stormed into the Benghazi Consulate and killed our diplomatic staff
• You and I

are all people of faith.  We don’t believe the same things, but we each believe our faith involves pleasing God – whomever God is for us. 

I’m imagining – again for the sake of argument – that Sam Bacile is a devout Jew, that the men who attacked the consulate are devout Muslims, and that you and I are devout practitioners of our own faith. 

Let’s say that – out of love for the God of Moses – Sam Bacile (or whatever his name is) wanted to teach “truths” about Islam – a faith he disagrees with.  And because some Muslims were outraged at what they considered blasphemy against Muhammed – out of love for the God they call Allah– they defended Muhammed in an act of retributive violence. 

Remember Diana Butler Bass’ book Broken We Kneel written after 9-11-01? Diana tells the story about her young daughter who asked why a neighbor was wearing a head scarf and Diana responded by saying, “That’s how she loves God“?

So, how do we love God? 

Do we practice spiritual disciplines like prayer and Bible study?  Do we practice acts of mercy like taking food to the sick and hungry?  Do we defame other faiths?  Do we physically or verbally harm people who criticize or disparage our religion?

One of the tasks of the 21st Century Church – and the 21st Century Mosque and the 21st Century Synagogue – is to develop skills in diversity competence.  Most of us are incompetent in connecting with people of other faiths. 

You might remember that after  9-11-01 it was discovered that most members of Congress did not know the difference between a Sunni and a Shiite Muslim (much less the Kharijites, Sufis, etc.)  And sadly, I doubt that most members of Congress can explain the differences eleven years later. 

I am convinced that the most pressing requirement for living in a pluralistic world involves learning about other faiths and connecting with people personally who practice them. 

Jesus himself did this.  For those of us who try to follow Jesus, maybe we need to remember that our multilingual Savior connected with Gentiles without threatening them or mocking them or hurting them.   We can even express our love for God by loving those who don’t know God the same way we do.

We can love God by connecting with organizations like the Interfaith Youth Corps or starting a Daughters of Abraham book group.  Or we can create incendiary media that mocks people of other faiths and strike out at those who understand God differently than we do.  But that is a very strange way to love God if you ask me.

HH and I watched The New Normal  last night and liked it, although it’s a bit of a fairy tale. (e.g. Rich gay couple gave the  surrogate mom a really nice house.) 

But not everybody likes this TV show. 

The One Million Moms organization – which has called on citizens to complain about a Skittles ad which involves a teenager making out with a walrus (I haven’t seen it)  is very concerned about  attempts to “desensitize America and our children.”  An ongoing conversation about popular media is this:  Does television promote a certain culture or does it reflect a certain culture?

The same question has been asked of The Church for generations:  Are we a thermostat or a thermometer?

The One Million Moms organization has every right to 1) ask networks not to show programs they find offensive and 2) boycott companies that advertise on these programs.  Also, they do not have to watch those shows.

But here’s my question:  What is the New Normal?  Especially in our churches, what family types have you found?  The stereotypical church family looks like this.  But actually, real church families are more varied.  I have not served wild and crazy congregations at all, but the communities I’ve served have included:

• Interracial couples
• Single moms who’ve adopted infants
• Single moms who’ve adopted older kids
• Gay couples with no kids
• Gay couples in the process of adopting kids
• Gay couples with kids from former relationships
• Lesbian couples with one mom giving birth to their kids
• Single moms who’ve undergone IVF
• Married couples who’ve undergone IVF
• Married couples who’ve adopted babies
• GBLTQ teens without parents
• Single people of every age and sexual orientation
• Couples (married and unmarried) who have been together for 60+ years

The New Normal TV show involves fertility issues, and all families are fertile in their own way.  And churches are fertile with spiritual richness while often looking like the Land of Misfit Toys. 

What does normal look like for your congregation?

Every time I was pregnant, I would look at the upcoming calendar and remember that there was a day coming – then unknown to me – that would become special for the rest of my life.

September 11 is one of those days for many people.

It’s corny and dramatic to say that 9-11-01 changed us all forever.  To me, being “changed forever” implies that every single day is different because of what happened on a particular day in the past. These are the days we didn’t see coming except as routine dates on the calendar.  But then something unexpected happened to shift your world into A New Normal.

If you lost a parent, spouse, best friend, sibling, or child on 9-11, your life changed forever.  If you suffered a chronic malady – either physical or mental – on 9-11 then every day is now different.

Some of my Life-Changed-Forever Days are:

• July 8, 1956
• April 8, 1984
• September 17, 1986
• September 16, 1988
• May 1, 2010

What about you?

I remember 9-11-01 very well.   It changed my life in that my heart still feels knotted up when I hear the old news accounts of that day.  But my trauma is nothing compared to others.

Today, let’s remember the survivors, the still-grieving, the Iraq and Afghanistan war veterans and their families, the families of Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden, and all for whom this day is very personal.  Praying for peace with all of you today.  And may we treasure our special days – even the very hard ones.

I was reading Thomas Friedman’s article here about “working hard and playing by the rules” or –  what it takes to land a good job today.  It moved me to think about what it takes to get a call to a church today.  Believe me, it takes more than working hard and playing by the rules.

It’s – first of all – of course, about God’s call.

God moves us and God moves search committees towards each other.  But there are many good candidates for ordination to professional ministry who work hard and play by the (seemingly countless) rules.

It used to be true that seminarians had a call waiting for them upon graduation, but those were the days when churches were large enough to have associate pastors or even “assistant pastors.”  Some of us will remember those days.

Today it takes an average of 2-3 years to find that first call out of seminary.  Why?

• Sometimes it’s because the candidate still has required preparation to complete: Clinical Pastoral Education or an internship or more time to take/pass ordination exams.
• Sometimes it’s because there are simply not enough positions for first-time calls.  As I write this, there are 327 people seeking their first call and there are 140 openings.
• Sometimes it’s because we have second career pastors who already have FT careers and they can take their time looking for a first pastoral call, waiting for just the right one.
• Sometimes those deemed ready to be ordained to their first call have spouses or other family members to accommodate.  Finding two positions in a certain geographic area is at least twice as hard as finding one.

So what about working hard and playing by the rules?  Those things are basic.

And it’s true that some Search Committees are looking for a certain age demographic that does not describe you.  But honestly, I’m finding that there are  committees looking pastors of every age group, depending upon the job description.

For the 21st Century Church (and maybe this was true for previous centuries to a point) churches seem to be looking for:

• An authentic pastor leader – someone who can articulate a vision based on the leading of the Spirit that matches the real context of that congregation.  (Example:  don’t call someone who says he can draw in lots of new members who look just like them when the neighborhood no longer looks like them.)
• Someone who will love you enough to tell you the difficult truth (“Our church is not a big deal in town any longer.”)
• Someone who will love you even when you freak out over cultural changes.  (e.g. You just noticed that even Church Culture needs to change and this is both Biblical and faithful.)
• Someone you will follow.  One phenomenon I’ve seen is the “older member” church who calls a young pastor with the intention of controlling her/him.  Don’t do this.
• Someone who is teachable.  Don’t call the woman/man who doesn’t care to learn who you are, what you are about, what new things God is pointing out.  Beware of wise fools.
• Someone who knows how to interpret the Word of God in live action.  Every academic person can do a book report.  But it takes a pastor to interpret how Scripture relates to our real life – and not only from the pulpit.  [Note: Loved reading this morning that my friend MK’s church in Chicago opened their doors to striking Chicago teachers who needed to use the facilities.  A small but teachable moment.]

New pastors will need to do more than work hard and follow the rules.  The unique thing about seminary training as opposed to other professional training is that you can jump through all the hoops, take all professional exams, and complete all academic requirements and STILL not be called to professional ministry.  It doesn’t mean you aren’t called to ministry.  It means you aren’t called to this particular ministry.  This is Good News if you understand that God does the calling and speaks to us through a variety of human beings and life circumstances.