A Church for Starving Artists

As you read this, I am driving to move to the state where I was born. I’ll be starting a new chapter in my ministry and I covet your prayers for safe travels today. Please also pray that my new ministry makes God happy.  Thanks.

PS As we remember Dr. King’s death today, please do not merely commemorate his life.  Please emulate him and speak up/pray up/act up for the sake of justice for all God’s people.

Tom Nichols writes in The Death of Expertise that many of us believe we don’t need experts anymore.  We can diagnose our own maladies using WebMD.  We can install our own ceiling fan using a YouTube video.  We can even be a member of the President’s cabinet with no experience leading a multi-million dollar organization.  How hard can it be?

There is ongoing conversation about the necessity of trained clergy in the 21st Century Church.  Seminary is expensive and professional ministers will never earn enough money to pay hefty student loans.  So, what if we minimize what a pastor really needs to know?  One can figure out how to do a Hebrew word study using an online concordance.  And there are numerous liturgical and preaching websites available to people with and without seminary degrees.

Maybe professional pastors and other church leaders need lots of formal training and maybe we don’t.  But the key to our effectiveness and growth is curiosity.

[Brief Rant:  I watched Bill Maher’s movie Religulous over the weekend and was much less frustrated by Bill Maher’s snarkitude about God than by the theological ignorance of most of the Christians he interviewed.  The Christian faith shared in this movie was so conflated with magic, Hallmark cards, Elf on a Shelf, and Disney World, that it’s no wonder people think Christians are ridiculous.  There was very little Biblical literacy and even less theological understanding among the faithful Maher talked with.  Come on, people.  Pick up a Bible.  Read a commentary.]

I appreciate experts.

I like my medical professionals, my construction professionals, and my government professionals well-trained.  I love that my doctor and my dentist refer to new studies they are reading.  I appreciate teachers who continue to learn.  I want my local police officers to be trained in de-escalating a dangerous situation rather than shooting first because “there was something in his hand.”  I had my car windshield replaced last week and it gave me comfort and joy to know that Tomas was an expert in replacing windshields.

I also appreciate curious people (who may or may not be experts.)

Knowing that we don’t know everything is essential. 

Being curious about what we can learn from others is also essential.

So . . . beware the incurious leader:

• Beware leaders who don’t have any interest in finding out the expertise in the room.  (I once worked with someone who was leading a discussion on a book without realizing that the author of the book was in the meeting.)
• Beware leaders who assume that their colleagues were totally ignorant/ineffective/lost before they showed up. (I’ve worked with leaders whose false assumptions about co-workers ruined their ability to build a team.)
• Beware leaders who need to be the smartest person in the room. (It’s not only okay not to be the smartest in the room, but it’s energizing if we aren’t the smartest person in the room.)
• Beware leaders who dismiss people they haven’t heard of. (Just because I haven’t heard of someone, doesn’t mean that person is not a rock star/has a lot to offer.)

Collaboration is more than a word to toss out there in hopes of impressing a pastor nominating committee.  Authentic collaboration – with staff members, with teams of volunteers, with ideas people – makes everybody more effective.

And don’t ask “I wonder” questions to seem interested when you really are not.  Instead, really wonder.

Image is a stock photo.

Easter meat is a theological choice for many of us. 

Some people choose lamb for Easter Sunday dinner because of this.  Or we choose ham believing that Jesus redeems and casts aside this.

But you have probably also noticed that bacon’s status as both hipster food and everything-is-better-with-it food is off the charts.  The Washington Post commented on this last week.  (I beg to differ with Mr. Carman.)

[Special tip of the hat to one of my favorite Chicago breakfast establishments which serves flights of bacon.]

Bacon’s smoky crunchiness improves everything from burgers to bloodies to dating apps.  But alas, it doesn’t mend broken hearts or balance the budget.

There is immediate satisfaction with bacon but – like many other immediate satisfactions – the truth is that it’s not a healthy choice.  In this season of Easter (Note: it’s not just one day) this is a good time to make healthy choices from taking our Sabbath to sharing our money with good causes that change the world.  Spring is upon us.  If we are lucky, there is bacon in the air.  But we also need to get our vegetable gardens going.  And maybe offer a hearty Thank You to the One who invented springtime.

Christ is risen.  Christ is risen indeed.

I heard my colleague    Samuel Son preach a great sermon in February about breakfast with Jesus.  He wondered if everybody had morning breath.

Dinner out tends to be a more dressed-up affair.  A dinner date tends to be even more formal.  There might be candlelight.  At the very least, people are wearing shoes.

Breakfast, on the other hand, is more intimate.  Our hair is uncombed and our eyes are sleepy and might be crusty with whatever. Usually, our companions at breakfast are more familiar to us.  We’ve been together through the night – whether in a bed or in a boat – like the first disciples who saw the LORD on the shore, cooking breakfast after their big haul of fish.

Today we remember the first last supper with Jesus and his followers.  There was bread.  There was wine.  There were probably other things to eat as well that one might find at a Passover meal. Several things happened that night after dinner and I wonder:

Did Jesus and his followers have communion breath?

Did they still have the taste of Jesus “body” and “blood” – in his words – on their lips?  Did they have any idea about the depth of what they had experienced at that last supper together?  Did Jesus still have the taste of wine and bread in his mouth when he was arrested?

Just as breakfast finds us with morning breath, I wonder if we consider that communion breath is a shared experience when we celebrate this holy meal together.  It’s the taste of bread and cup.  But it’s also the taste of community and presence because the ruah of God – the breath of God – has been poured out upon our meal.

I think this is kind of cool.

Tonight many of us will leave spiritual gatherings with communion breath.  I hope we can taste that holy meal for a while so that we remember for longer than a couple moments.

Image is a detail of Semen Zhivago’s “Last Supper Mosaic” (1879-87) in St. Isaac’s Cathedral, St. Petersburg. 

As a good Southern girl, I was occasionally admonished for being “ugly” which meant my actions were unattractive and unladylike.  Ugly behavior included sassing, whining, and gossipping.

On this Holiest of Weeks, we recall that a humble and just man  – sent by God to show us what love looks like – was brutally tortured because he stood up to worldly powers and privilege.  It was ugly in a way that made unladylike “ugliness” look ridiculously tame.

It was over the top – even for the Roman authorities – to torture and execute someone who had not committed murder, rape, or grand larceny. He had not caused bodily harm to anyone.  But, he had calmly challenged the political and religious leaders of the day.  And they crucified him for it.

Ugly behavior can ratchet up to monstrous behavior in no time.  We are observing such behavior in our beloved nation today:

• If we have to photoshop false images to make our point, we have stooped to ugly/monstrous behavior.
• If we have to deface and threaten people with whom we disagree, we have stooped . . .
• If we have to threaten someone to get our way, we’ve stooped . . .

The world in which we live can be true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and “of good report.”  But more often it seems to be deceptive, ignoble, unjust, dirty, ugly, and unworthy of praise.  The first Holy Week was such a time.

Nevertheless I believe that good will triumph.  Not to get too far ahead of myself, but . . . Easter.  And before we get all Scarlett O’Hara together, keep in mind that Jesus was crucified because he stood up to evil.

We are called to do that too.

Image is Philippians 4:8 with a personal reminder.

“Guac was unlike anyone else. He’s funny. Probably one of the most free-spirited people I know. He’s just absolutely beautiful, like a beautiful face, like an angel.”  Sam Zeif about his friend Joaquin Oliver — called “Guac” – who died 2-14-18 at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, Parkland FL

As we discern new ways to be the Church, I’m increasingly interested in the Cafe Plan. (Note:  This is not the same as a Cafeteria Plan of pick and choose your own theology.)  Coffee Shop Church is not a new thing, but Death Cafe is new to me.  Some Death Cafes meet in church buildings.  Others meet in homes and public libraries.

I have also heard of congregations/church coffee shops offering:

• Peace Cafes – interfaith gatherings to talk about important topics
• Bible Cafes – Bible study gatherings for the curious
• Food Cafes – tasty low cost lunches for the community

These cafe offerings would be most effective in locations that look more like a coffee shop than a church building.  Most Millennials and younger don’t do church buildings.

Imagine new congregations which serve their communities by feeding them food and scripture, offering opportunities to talk with people of other faiths or no faith, and offering opportunities to talk about an issue that every human will eventually face: death.  This would be a great model for church – but that’s a topic for another post.

This post is about death – a topic we deny and find uncomfortable until it hits us up close and personal.  This story on All Thing’s Considered yesterday touched my heart.  How many of us simply need to talk about death, to share our death stories, to cry – perhaps years after our losses – with people who won’t tell us to get over it?

High School Senior Sam Zeif: “Yeah, we finally did the march, and that’s something we’ve all been anticipating for a month now. I don’t know when or if or how I’ll ever get over this, I don’t want to get over it because I feel like getting over it is sort of forgetting.”

Yes, we also need grief counselors and therapists and chaplains.  But sometimes we simply need to talk over coffee with people who get it, who don’t try to fix us.  The church could offer opportunities for this – but, for the love of Jesus, please don’t read this blog and think to yourself, “This could be a new way to get members!”  No, that’s not it.  It’s never about that.

It’s about being God’s people out in the world where people are hungry for food, eternal meaning, relationships, and deep peace.  And maybe coffee.

Images from Death Cafe and Reuters

I thank the Almighty for Jill Hudson, author of books and sharer of wisdom.  I refer people to her books at least once a month.

Jill Hudson has taught church leaders about conflict for decades now.  Here’s one Presbytery’s notes on her teaching.  In a nut shell, there are five levels of conflict:

• Level One Conflict – There’s a problem to solve.  (Which day will the pastor take as his/her Sabbath?)  The issue is clear and specific and easily resolved.
• Level Two Conflict – There’s a disagreement. (The Music Minister and the Pastor disagree about the amount of featured music during worship.) The issue might birth a creeping distrust but it’s actually possible that “everybody can win.”
• Level Three Conflict – There’s a contest.  (Some church members are angry about same sex marriage and others are happy about it, and the increasingly heated contest is about whom Jesus loves best.)  The issue will result in someone “winning” and someone “losing.”  Accusations and behaviors that bear no resemblance to Jesus ensue.
• Level Four Conflict – There’s a fight.  (Mr. Been-Here-Forever wants to destroy the Pastor who – unlike former Pastors – doesn’t give Mr B-H-F complete freedom to do whatever he wants in church leadership.)  It’s ugly.  Ugly accusations.  Ugly outbursts.  It’s ugly enough to make a lot of people – including the pastor – leave.
• Level Five Conflict – There are irreconcilable differences/horror movie-worthy motifs. (A Parishioner spray-paints ‘Satan Lover’ on the Pastor’s garage door.)  Things are out of control.  Dogs and cats fighting in the streets. Everybody’s hair’s on fire.

Every pastor and every congregation – and every business, educational institution, government office, non-profit, family and neighborhood – has endured conflict.  Jill Hudson specifically talks about congregational conflict and at a leadership gathering on Wednesday, she reminded me that “Pastors rarely survive a Level Three or higher Conflict.”  

I once survived a High Three.  In fact, I thrived after that conflict and stayed with the congregation I was serving for fifteen additional years.

I’ve been prayerfully analyzing how and why I survived and it occurs to me that – instead of The Perfect Storm – I experienced The Perfect Calm.

The Conflict: Beloved church member who was also on staff was let go for cause.  Because we loved her and her family, we asked for the elders to keep the details confidential.  She went on to greater things.  The congregational went on to greater things.  Jesus reigns.

How was this possible – especially when there were shades of Level 4 (sacks of dirty diapers left in my driveway, personal threats to my safety) and Level 5 (someone declared a fatwa against me.)?  The answers – which were blessings from heaven and not a result of my awesome leadership – are the same answers that mark a thriving church:

1. The congregation was not stuck.  We had new members all the time and no one ever said, “We’ve always done it this way” because we rarely did anything the same way.  The congregation was too transient for that to happen much.
2. There was no gossip – at least about this situation.  20 people knew every detail and 20 people kept confidentiality for the sake of healing and wholeness.
3. Communication was excellent.  There were warnings to the staff member.  There were records kept.  The whole board was informed of all the specifics.  The congregation was informed as much as possible.  There were public conversations to answer questions.
4. The congregation trusted their leaders.  We shared that the elders’ vote was unanimous and that fact indicated to church members that Elder X (a much respected leader) and Elder Y (another respected leader who rarely agreed with Elder X) and Elder Z (who was new but growing in leadership skills) had all agreed about this decision.  And that also impressed church members.  Parishioners didn’t have all the details about the situation, but they didn’t need them.
5. The Presbytery was visible and appreciated.  Neighboring church leaders stepped in to support the congregation on behalf of the Presbytery.
6. The elders backed up the Pastor during this stressful time.  Instead of pulling the Pastor aside to say, “You need to leave,” the Pastor was surrounded by elders who said, “It probably feels tempting to leave right now, but we trust you to get us through this.”
7. We prayed (a lot) and the Pastor discovered that trusting in God was her most essential recourse.  Note: there were moments when I prayed for God to give me the right words, my mouth opened, and the perfect words came out.  That was the Holy Spirit right there.

Conflicted times are not calm times . . .  unless God is in total control.  Note:  God uses more than “thoughts and prayers.”  God also works through faithful Elders, hopeful Pastors, extraordinary Educators, gifted Musicians, solid leadership training, theologically wise children, and Jill Hudson.  Thanks be to God.  And hang in there.

Image is the church fight scene from The Kingsman.

It’s common to hear that organizations are striving to become more nimble these days.  What does that mean for a church?

• The worship bulletin says we are singing Hymn #100 but at the last minute we switch to #84?
• Maybe we’ll have Bible study this week and maybe we won’t?
• There are no set office hours?

Uh, no.  That’s not what it means to be a nimble church. Processes and schedules are not the issue. In fact, processes and schedules can actually set us free to be more nimble in other, more creative ways.

Not nimble: Creating something new and requiring every detail to be spelled out and every question to be answered before giving it a chance.

Nimble: Having a basic plan, consider the “what ifs?” and then try it.  We can tweak details later.

Not nimble: Creating something new, loving it, and then institutionalizing it “forever.”

Nimble:  Agreeing that youth cotton candy sculpture contest was a blast but it’s okay if we don’t do it again anytime soon.

Not nimble: Discerning a fresh idea for mission and making the creators jump through 7 hoops before they can carry it out.

Nimble:  If it falls within the core values and the budget of the church, we try it.

Not nimble: Designing our staff the way we’ve always done it.

Nimble: Designing our staff based on our community’s particular needs.

Mary Ann McKibben Dana’s new book on improv comes out May 8th and I hope you’ll pre-order it like I have.  Being nimble includes being open to improvisational ministry – which makes total sense in these days when cookie cutter churches and “business as usual” don’t work anymore (if they ever did.)

We human beings are healthier physically when we stay nimble.  Organizations are healthier when we are organizationally nimble too.

Those of us who like to know exactly what to expect might find this uncomfortable.  But just as our world is quick and shifting and full of surprises, our ministry must be prepared, as well, to be quick, shifting and full of surprises!

Image source.

. . . is to help somebody know that they’re loved and capable of loving.

The Reverend Fred Rogers

As I travel today, there’s no time for a real post, but I’ll leave you with this and hope you’ll join me in buying tickets.  Opening day is June 8th.  Have a lovely day.

Today at an address in New Hampshire, the President said the United States must “get tough” on opioids. “And that toughness includes the death penalty.”  The image at the top of this post is what immediately popped into my head.  I believe that the President was referring to the death penalty only for the people on the left of that photo.

One of the reasons why so many black and brown men have been incarcerated is because the laws are harsher for black and brown men.  I can name many young white men who have used and sold illegal drugs and not one has been jailed.

This is not about getting tough on opioids or other illegal substances.  I fear that this is another “opportunity” to destroy men of color.  Or maybe the death penalty comment was just a hyperbolic remark tossed out for cheap applause with no intentions to follow through.

Either way, addressing opioid addiction is crucial.  Addressing the uneven incarceration of men of color is also crucial – and it’s been an issue for hundreds of years in this country.

Two blog posts in one day is not my norm.  But I couldn’t not say something.

Images are of actors playing drug dealers.  On the left are characters from The Chi (which is one of the best shows on television if you are looking for something to watch.)  On the right are actors from “The Preppie Connection” based on the true story about student cocaine dealers at Choate Rosemary Hall.  The white kid was arrested and convicted.  He got five years of probation and no prison time.